Monday, July 8, 2013

Dilemma

Daily I am assaulted by the cloying smell of my second-degree nephew's
deodorant.
It is clearly his adolescent ignorance for the new-fangled behind this
brouhaha, for surely, beyond the excuse of being subjected to
merciless perspiration precipitated by faulty biological
processes(which he is no victim of), there is no sensible reason that
will absolve him of his sin of excess beyond excess such that every
half-hour is marked by sudden disappearances barely making the
two-minute mark, before he emerges once more the depths of his room to
plague me anew with the renewed vigour of the thick miasma upon his
person. His fumigant has amalgamated with his own effluvia to create a
potent affront to my nasal faculties and personal sensibilities, for
his perceived solution to a non-existent problem has become a problem
in itself, and one of even greater magnitude. I try to distance
myself, however, his deprivation of a male figure other than his
grandfather(my uncle), manifests in his constant conquests for
interaction. He is quite oblivious to all of this, quite content with
the novelty of his addiction. I wonder sometimes: does he feel a
strange satisfaction each time he smudges his ________ on the pits of
his arms? Don't even get me started on his Eau de Saster fancy which
is just as bad.

These things I suffer in silence, for the rest of the household condones them.

1 comment:

  1. What's with the diction in this post? haha as for your nephew, perhaps he just needs to be told that deodorant ≠ cologne / perfume! haha

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